恐懼

星期日天, 和cathy 和她的host family 一起去禮拜堂.她的host mama 有一個十一歲的外孫.
在墨國出生,住在杜拜,讀書. 會西班牙語,英語,阿拉伯語, 學習著法語.
問他喜歡杜拜還是墨國, 答案脫口而出, "of course Dubai. because of the shooting."

"shooting?" 一時回不過神來.
他解釋, 墨西哥危險啊, "here, you can hear shooting everyday. I can walk alone outside the house, shopping malls and don't have to worry about anything. we don't lock the door in Dubai. Keys are left there."

一個十一歲的男孩口中聽到/感受到現實的恐懼...hmmm...

而這種的恐懼是如影隨形. 小男孩說, 以前只是聽到有壞人在釀造著動盪,在其他城市中發生著, 對monterrey 的人來說像夢境, 當壞人來了該誠, "turns the dream into a reality".

在聚會中, 牧者assured the mass, 說是在動盪不安的世代, 頭上的那位會保守會眾的平安...

聽了一堂不錯的道, (雖然在一個悶熱的會堂中,我有點昏昏欲睡) 是一個26歲德國女生的講道,談她在南美的cultural shock, which is about being transparent in a community.
talking about lust--- which is something that we do so excessively. the fear and scar of being rejected and defiance becomes the self-defense mechanism....
the faith in stepping out of the comfort zone....

想到自己的未來, 也開始有點的不安....