Random

因為旅行, 戒了一個星期的電腦, 回來後, 一連看了一整天的新聞, 覺得自己很無知, 世界很大, 而自己的知識是如此地貧乏, 有一種知識貧乏焦慮症. 又想到自己在兩年的大學生涯, 看的readings 很少, being a year3 student, feel like intellectually ignorant, 而這裏的學生的視野很廣 (起碼有大半班的local politics students ), 不但知道墨國的事, 近至美國,加拿大 (coz of the NAFTA free trade among the three countries), 遠至中東, 甚至亞洲, 泰國是亞洲唯一沒有成為殖民地的國家, 他們都知道...更是覺得自己的無知....


知恥近乎勇,於是很努力地讀 readings, but damn, everyday 40 pages, life is not sustainable, and it really leaves me no time for Spanish.  To make it worse, due to sleep deprivation,  the effectiveness and efficiency of my reading process is poor.

I could not recall or link all the stuffs together during the discussion. 5 hours for 30-page long reading....

人變得易燥,而且對自己的力有不逮既恨又無奈... anti-social syndrome sets in.

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心情不太好的時候, 我喜歡去剪頭髮.

墨國的太陽很勤奮, 下午6點了, 還是辣辣地掛在半空. 上完課後, 去了一家朋友介紹的理髪店. 店鋪只有一個人, 店主是一個看上去60多的老伯, 不高, 行動有點緩慢, 會說英文, 很友善.

他慢慢地幫我洗頭,不時有水花濺在我的臉上, 客人是坐在椅子上,把頭往後靠在盥盆上, 雖然只是短短幾分鐘, 可辛苦了我的脖子.

在他給我的髪型雜誌中選了一個短髮.
他把書放在座位旁, 看著幫我剪.

他說, 他來自墨國南部一個美麗的城市, beautiful scenery yet life is hard. 跟中國一樣, 墨國也有地區發展不平均的情況, 墨國是南窮北富 而南面卻又是文化/種族最多元化的地區, 古老的瑪雅文明便在墨國的南部, 還有鄰國 Guatemala, Belize, Honduras.  

他說,他來monterrey 有30年了.
他說,他喜歡剪頭髮, to him, hair-cutting is form of art.
他說, 他在大學時, 讀的便是arts, 而剪頭髮是其中一個Course.
他說, he has one brother and one sister.  His brother is operating another salon in another district. His sister is a social worker in a University.

他打了個呵欠, 問他是不是累了, 他回答, "I am just a bit restless these days. you know, the end of the month, people run out of money. but, tomorrow, hope tomorrow will be different."

Hope for Tomorrow.
Despite today's unpleasant circumstances, as long as there is hope for the future, people can still carry on. and Mexican people have hope. 
想起在國慶前, 有同學問,with regard to the current drug wars, 為什麼墨國不停止慶祝活動, 西班牙老師的一句, "we have got a life to live, we can't stop enjoying life. "

The word of the day: Hope

Learn to be hopeful and we have got a life to live.

帶著一個袁詠儀在<金枝玉葉>的頭開心回家.

雜記

因為墨國慶祝她獨立200週年,於是逃了2天課, 在星期一的晚上乘overnight bus 離開所在的城市---Monterrey, 與3個新加坡學生一起去Zacatecas, Guadalajara y Guanajuato. 


3個新加坡學生, 一個是Jacintha, 一個是Leon, 一個是從內地到新加坡讀書的maoching. 其實所有的行程都是Leon 和Maoching 計劃的, 我喜歡做 free rider. 他們的西班牙文好嘛, much is given, much is expected. 其實我們也是去了當地, 然後到當地的Tourism office 拿地圖和問職員, 該去哪裡; 又或者是問我們的hostel 老闆, 有什麼好推介, 再經衡量去想去的地方. 很隨性,也很舒服. 


太多感覺, 很難把它們好好地組織起來,以自己那種professionist 的態度一定會把entry一拖再拖,怕記憶經不起在年月流逝的考驗. 所以寫一篇隨筆吧. 有空的時候再出賣友人的 juicy故事.

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之前寫, 墨國很少人乘巴士, 而且不安全; 經過這趟旅行後,改觀了. 
我們去不同的城市, 乘坐的都是巴士. 很安全, 你可以一覺睡到終點. 不用怕打劫, 也不用怕有人會偷竊. 

墨國的長途巴士分3個等級. 
最高級的, 像是飛機的商務客位, 軟座, 有獨立耳塞,可自動換台, (可選擇看電影, 或是不同的電台), 有腳墊, 總之就是舒服二字. 


第二級, 軟座, 沒有獨立耳塞,  沒有腳墊, 只能選擇看電影與否,其實也沒有選擇, 因為無論你看不看,電影都播放著. 


第三級,硬座, 什麼也沒有...

因為隨性而行,到巴士總站隨便選一家巴士公司買票,結果我們乘搭了三種巴士.

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不懂西班牙文真的是一個很大的問題,  most of tour guides in museums speak in Spanish, illustrations and explanation of the exhibitions are in Spanish, 言語問題, 很難和這些城市, 這個國家和這裏的人談戀愛.曾看過一篇文章, 說的是兩個言語不通的人愛上了對方, 然後靠翻譯字典談了一輩子的戀愛, 作者慨嘆當中的戀愛疲倦.  可是經此一遊, 倒是在想, 若沒有內容, 又怎能戀一世的愛? 雖然疲倦, 也說明了大家去彼此的在乎. 畢竟一段關係還是要好好地經營的....

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在這裏買東西, 人們不習慣討價還價.明碼實價,喜歡就買, 不喜歡就拉倒.
若你真的很喜歡, 又覺得太貴, 便露出一臉的喜歡, 再帶點遺憾的表情, 店主便會主動把價錢降至他/她覺得可以的價錢. 「一走了之」的壓價方法是行不通的. 


我喜歡這種mentality,省卻了不少麻煩, 也不會有因為還價能力低而導致「唉呀, 買貴了」的遺憾.墨國人就有這種樂天知命, 隨遇而安的性格, 當中的正能量也感染著我們. 


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墨國是一個很浪漫的地方, 人們隨地擁吻,  在公園, 在廣場, 在巴士站, 一切都是那麼自然. 最深刻的一幕是在一個叫 kissing valley 的地方, 一位老伯在群眾的嘩叫中, 吻了他圍著頭巾的老伴.
kissing valley 是一個墨國版的Romeo-and-Juliet 故事.  (according to Maoqing)


一個窮礦工和一個富家千金在教堂彌撒中一見鍾情, 可是千金的爸爸不允許, 要女兒要麼嫁給西班牙的一個有錢老頭, 要麼給軟禁在一間獨立的屋子內. 女子選了後者. 


礦工後來掘到金子, 成了有錢人, 便在富家千金的屋子旁蓋了另一暑房子, 由於兩間房子很近的關係, 兩人可以隔著陽台接吻. 


好景不常, 千金的爸爸發現了,在一番的爭論中, 千金死在父親的槍下.....


留給世人的教訓是: 
如果你跟情人到此, 一定要在kissing valley kiss each other, then you will have 5-year good luck or else, you will have 6-year bad luck...


and indeed , lots of people were queuing for such KISS. and the old couple are one of those. 


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Music is a universal language, sports are a universal language. One mexican guy told me that Kiss and sex are universal languages too. 


well, I have not turned into a slut yet....

相信

被相信被肯定的感覺是幸福的. 要記下來, 不然怕記憶背叛了你我.

收到阿守的電郵, 他是在Papua New Guinea 遇見的一個25歲緬甸男生. 在PNG的其中一個城市遇見一個中年男人, 交談之下才發現他是 the President of PNG Burmese Association.打後的城市, 每當落泊、沒有落腳處時, 便向那個城市的burmese members 求助.

而遇見阿守, 是在回到capital Port Morseby的時侯, 而我們會在第二天的早上飛回香港. 那一晚, 那個bumese community, we ate together, we drank together, we sang, we danced, we smoke and we talked...

夜深了, 我們坐在一起, 談以前high school, 談未來, 他說, 他想成立一個教育基金, 去幫助緬甸學生, 因為只有教育可以改變思想,改變人生...

墨國經常在violance n shooting 的包圍中, 想起在PNG經歷著相同的他, 在農歷新年, 收到他的email, 告訴我, 有一群人到他工作的supermarket 打劫, 槍戰中, 一個保安受傷了.
便寫了一個電郵給他, 告訴他, I feel him.

and then he wrote back with encouragement attached.

"don't give up to get your goal in your hands. now is really close n time for u to grab the opportunities around u. I believe from the start that you are very sharp n active to achieve even though lots of ups n downs awaiting. "

感動極了.

*                                                *                                        *

Carol mama sent 了一個inbox message 給我, 她是catch magazine 的editor之一.
我跟她說,我很好, 總是遇到了好人. 而學習上, felt belittled coz those classmates are really talented and knowledgeable.

she wrote back:

"i find the reason why ppl doing good to you,
it's because you are a really nice girl,
you are kind, nice and brave......
anyway, ppl can't help being good to you!"

"Remember the parable of 1000, 2000, 5000 ?
the one gain another 2000, praised with the same words comparing the one gain another 5000. the point is, they are praised and affirmed for their attitude, "good and faithful" !!!
(to me, you are talented, really the one got 5000)
you are the kind of person, never "play-it-safe", which is precious in God's eyes ^^"

*                                             *                                                            *

或許是因為在一個單親家庭成長, 又因為在生命不同的浮萍奔波中, 外表堅強的自己其實很不安, 有時,別人的一個眼神, 一個舉動, all have a haunting effect on the peace of mind. feel like such imperfection can hamper the harmony of relationship, and then those people will just walk away from your life.
years later, if chance works in our turn, then we discuss , then we found out such discrepancy between our perceptions towards the specific incident, 才發現我們都錯過了彼此.

to avoid such Right Person, Right place, but Wrong time 的遺憾,所以很用心地對待每一個人.

     可是苦了自己.所以可以遇到一個人/ 群體, 可以舒服做自己的機會不多.

想起前天的bungee jump. 雙手緊握的放不開, 想起昨天去mexico rural 跟local 同學討論, 之前Mexican perception of Chinese as Ugly, 一個同學大呼不是, 說,
"well, we make jokes out of Mexicans lots of times, we make fun out of many things. Maybe making fun out of Chinese is one of such."

直至下筆的現在,忽然明白了什麼, 是那種對"自我感覺良好"的執著, 是對完美自我的包裝. 是少了一種 nothing-to-lose 的勇氣.

people come and go and walk away, why cares so much ?
and why do I have to be perfect to be accepted?

If those people just walk away from you just because of small stain in your personality, should you put them in you heart ?


從今天起, 要做一個勇敢的黃秋娥. :)

"只想做個家庭主婦"

上星期天,跟一個叫Estanfanny的女生談天.

她說, "People get into this University just for fame and fortune. But to be frank, I just want to marry to a good man, and be a good housewife."


心頭一震...為什麼會那麼吃驚呢?

TEC (Monterrey)是一間私立大學,也是墨國數一數二的名牌大學. 學生每個學期的學費大概是65,000 PESO.而學生一共要讀9個學期, 那是接近60萬PESO. 不少學生要借錢, 就算有scolarship 也要過著沒有人生的生活,study, study.然後是一畢業便work like  a dog to repay the loan.

而EStanfanny 是交全費的學生. 然後,她說,她只想做一個家庭主婦, 一個60萬學歷的主婦.

可是,誰說不可以?
誰說,讀書就一定要幹出點什麼來?
誰又說,家庭主婦可以不問學歷?

她說,她之前想做一個廚師,學費是50,000/SEM. 而父母說, 如果她一定要讀大學, 又一定要讀那麼貴的degree, 那一定是 TEC (Monterrey). 於是她進了TEC (Monterrey), 讀的是communication. 讀了一年後, 覺得不踏實, 覺得好像沒怎麼學習, 也談不上什麼motivation, 而又覺得自己很喜歡maths, 便想轉讀engineering. 不過要defer 1 year. meaning you have to pay more. 跟父母一談之下, 得到了支持, 於是從頭開始.

"It is not that hard to get into the TEC (Monterrey), the hardest part comes into paying the tuition fee."  She footnoted.

一個烈女? 她只是一個清楚自己想要什麼的一個女生. 在不斷的experiment 中, 背後需要的是一個龐大的財團支持.

快樂基因

來墨西哥前,有一個電影會, 當中有2位墨西哥人在座分享,說是在經歷不同的ups and downs,Mexicans are happy people.

來到這裏, 感覺到當中的生活/人生哲學.

參加了一個幫未來小學老師改善他們英文對話技巧的義工活動.
在準備時, 一個組員說,在個人簡介的問題中, 要問他們: "What's your goal in life?"
組員叫Daniel, 讀的是Commercial Law, 是天之驕子的學科. 他說, 這是他教授考驗學生的方法,在一大堆理論後, 總會問一些看似"無厘頭",但卻比之前學術問題更難答的問題, 而"What's your goal in life?" is one of such.

他也希望問我們的學生這個問題, know why they are here such that they can get most out of the workshop.
And then I asked him what his goal in life is.

He laughed with a blush.
"Well, I want to do something good to the society and make it a better place to live. hmmm, and be happy."

And other group mate, Carlos, pondered for a while, and said, he wanted to enter the finance industry and earned money. "of course, to be happy about everything in life."

然後,在workshop, 一個學生答, :" To be happy at each moment is my life goal. My father used to teach me that, there is only goal in every person's life--- that's to be happy. No matter under what conditions."

簡單的人生目標, 開心就好. 驟耳一聽, 簡單得叫人乍舌, 開心/ 快樂/幸福? 是不是太享樂主義? 可是再想想, 簡單, 但卻總結了人生.

追名逐利的背後, 最後想要的是開心/ 快樂/幸福; 營營役役, 為口奔馳, 到最後, 想要的是開心/ 快樂/幸福.

可是很多時, 我們都忘了初衷, 以致在營役的人生中忙,茫,惘,亡....

來墨國交流以療情傷的Jacintha 說了一句很簡單的話, "Mexico does have a subtle positive effect on people".

是的, 墨西哥人就有那麼一種的快樂基因, 叫人感到當中閃爍的人性.

"一個充滿動盪和災難的環境裡，人仍能擁抱對美好社會的盼望，並拿出無比的勇氣去實踐，即使過程中也有錯失的時候。"

短談

因為 politics project, 而去找了課程的professor, Gerry, for the two politics courses, International Negotiations and International Organizations.

He is good, very knowledgeable, but the problem with his teaching is that, he jumps too fast, and the examples he has given is beyond my comprehension, with regard to my limited knowledge of contemporary world history and events. (actually, I am the person to take the blame.)

不過, 還是很開心和他一起談天.
問完了project,想跟他談多一點有關Drug cartels in Mexico.
他的解釋一如他的lecture, confusing for me. 為了作個註腳, 把理解到的寫下來.

他說, drug cartels的崛起可以追溯到美國在80s/90s 成功cracked down and blocked Columbia drug cartels,  阻止了他們運毒往往美國的路線.

然後是, NAFTA (North America Free Trade Agreement) 在90年代初的達成, greatly increase the trade volumes, and those Drug Cartels in Mexico and previously in Columbia seized the opportunity to expand their business by taking advantage of the NAFTA.

Then it has to deal with the democratization in Mexico.
之前, the political power of  Mexico was concentrated in one party. To make a way for the business, those drug cartels had to bride the politicians, such as giving 10% of the business profit to the government.

With the democratization in Mexico, which is a way to decentralize the power. then, the drug cartels realized that they no longer need the politicians, they can create their people in the government, and why would they have to share the 10% profit with the government.

於是, drug wars started. Drug cartels fight against the government. they fight among themselves.

Gerry highlighted one point, 就是在墨西哥沒有法律去管制不明財產. 不少人在毒品交易中謀取了暴利, 在美國, 如果你不能提供證據證明你的收入是合法獲取, 政府可以沒收你的財產. 可是, 墨國沒有. 因而, drug cartels dealers can enjoy the profit and will fight whatever it takes to secure their source of profit.

he said, setting up law to regulate the wealth obtainment is  crucial to curd the drug war.

Mexico's war on drugs: optimism has turned to depression

Daily Readings

Mexico: safer than Canada

interesting figures.
still remember what the negotiation professor has commented, he felt that Mexico is a lot safer than París, he sttood as the international professor, who has been teaching in París, now in Monterrey, working for the US governement.

he also highlight the uniquness of Mexíco in Latin America, Military´s loyalty to the Constitution.
In Argentina, in Brazil,  Military men overthrew the corrupt government and become the new corrupt one.

In Mexíco, despite the corrupt, incompetent government, the military is under the control.

累

因為任性, 又可以說是因為想洗心革面,努力讀書, 要在幾天內追回三星期的readings, 是physical也是interlectual 自殺. 在兩天只睡了7小時的人生裏, 是可以想像的累, 譬如, 明明說話者用心地, 一字一句地述說著, 你看著他的嘴在一張一合, 你卻完全不知道他在說什麼; 又譬如,對著computer.視線開始模糊,有點像是視力退步的人, 遂漸地走向黑暗;再譬如,讀了一整頁書, 準備翻開另一頁時, 問自己讀了什麼, 腦海是一片空白...

報了拳擊課程, 這裏, 上什麼課都要take attendance, 如果不夠attendance, 那是可以fail整個course. 而這個拳擊課程是免費的, 但如果不夠attendance, 便要付原本的價錢, 大約是600peso. 因此在沒有帶運動服的情況下, .穿著牛仔裙的情況下, 還是厚著面皮, 硬著頭皮去了. 幸好是女子拳擊, 但還是挺狼狽的...


上完拳擊,去computer center完最後幾段的essay, 而下一課的時間到了, 一連上兩課, 3 小時,而且之後退還有一個volunteering 的workshop... 決定走第一堂課, 去library休息...

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上完了課後了, 去了一個義工的briefing session.
Mexico Rural. 是去一些比較偏遠的地區, 教當地小朋友知識.

因為想taste more of Mexico, despite hardly speaking Spanish, I take part in this program.
每個學生都要想一個program.
由於不懂spanish, 只能想到教小朋友折紙...

這個community 的負責人叫Bernice的年輕女子,有點像亞洲人。在聽完其他同學present 完他們的proposal 後,她留下來, 很用心地用相片,用影片,告訴我有關那間學校的背景, 去年有什麼活動...

那是一間很小規模的學校，兩個年級共用一個班房，全校六個年級，不超過５０人。究竟他們是如何磨合當中的程度不同，Bernice也不知道。只知道，這間學校去年在全國／全市區(?)統一考試中是拿第一名的，像是香港的學能測驗／小學的ＧＳＴ程度考試。為什麼那麼厲害的學校也要大學生的輔導？為什麼不把資源放到其他更有需要的社區去？Bernice說，Mexico Rural 是想把exposure 帶到不同的社區去，　也想讓Tec的學生去體驗不同的社區，好的沒那麼好的，而考試成績好不等於沒有需要。。。

當中大約有好幾百張相，十幾個vedios, 她逐一地show給我看，告訴我相片中的人和事。（表面上，我是興致勃勃，其實我很困也很累。）
不過，一個小男孩的故事觸動著Bernice，也觸動了我。　


小男孩今年三年級,得了一種病，四肢癱瘓，只有手指可以有一點的活動能力,像是寫字。　
Bernice 說, 在墨國,人們是沒有這種包容性, "but we are working on it, but you know, it takes time to change the mentality."
可是在這間學校, 無論學生和老師都對小男孩很好,他在一個愛與包容的環境中成長.而小男孩的名字叫 "Angel".

"He is also happy and easy-going too. He is aware of, errr of..."

"disability?" 我插嘴

"his conditions and he accepts the way he is."  Bernice said.

她展示了幾張老師抱他入教室,同學幫忙提他輪椅的相片給我看.

"it shows human spirits. and it also humbles you down to do so." She said in a smile.

她展示了一個小女孩和小男孩的合照, 她說, 小女孩喜歡上了Angel. 她偷偷地告訴她, 在她十五歲的成人禮上, 她的第一支舞要和Angle 跳.

"In Mexico, it is a big event when a girl turns into 15. a big party will be organized. the girl, she doesn't know that Angel can't dance with her, but still in her pure heart, Angel is like a normal person... " Bernice said.

在其中的一個vedio中, 小朋友圍圈在玩傳汽球的活動. 輸了的小朋友要自動搬開坐的椅子離開.
"You can tell, even they lose, they leave the circle with a happy face." Bernice smiled.

是啊,在遊戲中, 看開了輸贏, 對於名利看得不那麼重, 日後的路也好走些.

Bernice 大概用了一小時去告訴我當中的種種, 我想還未去那間學校, 我已愛上那裡, 因為那個叫Angel 的小男孩; 因為沒有計算, 只有單純地想去愛一個人, 全力地去告訴他,他有多特別的, 那種純真年代的愛情;因為Bernice的passion....

Bernice 說她有一個朋友在紐約博士畢業, 主修心理學, 音樂治療, 跟天使男孩有著一樣的狀況.
她已邀請他去探望天使男孩, 並和他的家人見面,讓他們知道天使男孩的未來可以有另一種可能. 不過, 她說, 她誰也沒說,想給大家一個驚喜...

"life is a bunch of surprises and possibilities, I like to believe that and I like to make people believe that. " She grinned.

很累, 可是裝著滿袋幸福回家.

從早上3時起床, 到現在10點, 嗯...

• Students here are required by LAW that they have to perform 480 hours community services 

• Lectures take attendance, 3 times being 10 minutes late are counted as 1 absence.

• They use continuous assessment method, such that you have to work hard throughout the semester.
• They have shuttle bus services, working from 6pm to 8am, to deliver students to their home (in front of the door of their home)

-----
乘校巴回家, 遇到了Edward. 早上在上學途中,他趕上來,和我一起走, 問:"what happened to your free ride?"

之前一次,拉丁美男Wubi載了我一程, 下車, 遇見了.
"that was just a random encounter. " I said.

"oh." kind of a relief.

上完課, 在校園趕essay, 又看見了他, 他走了過來, 談了幾句, 正好和在facebooking 中. 便ADD了他. coz The sloth and the pig were commenting on my post, and I wrote something about him in the comment.  had to delete it.


他說, 我是不是在跟蹤他, 怎麼可以遇到那麼多次.
我只是笑著說, 哈哈, 沒錯.
 oh, boy. you are just a kid to me. ...

活著多好

Sangita是另一個新加坡女生, that Ｉhang out quite often,無它的, 只是在言談間, 大家覺得對味了, 便開始在對方心中有了一定的地位.

(sangtita & jacintha 都是印尼裔的新加坡人.)

星期天是她22歲的生日, 星期六的晚上10點,我們一班人集聚在她的apartment里,等待和她一起蜡烛.她在早上和另一個roommate 去了瀑布爬艇, (她和三個德國人住, 是在學生的apartment大廈中) 說好是7點回來,可是在凌晨了也不見她, 電話從下午七點就不通了.
大家都開始擔心了. 為什麼?發生了什麼事?


一個很奇怪的party,一眾賓客都來了, 可欠缺了主角. 而且主角的room mates都不在. 只是她room mate的朋友們在一旁招呼客人,是另一群的德國人. (住在另一個單位)

在凌晨一點後,大家都慌了, 開始找電話, 她去的那個瀑布團電話, 可是卻是語音電話. 然後是打給university, 官方說如果明早不見才找警察幫忙.
折騰了一小時, 終於, 她的德國朋友說, 大家各自回去休息, 臨走前更幫忙收拾好才走.

後來, sangita 在早上回來了.

今天重遇, 她說, 她們給困在山上了. 因為剛下了雨, 航道改了..... 具體詳情也不大清楚. 只是知道, 當時她在山上, 又冷又餓, 看著天色從明到暗,再從暗到明, 在深夜時分, 真的覺得自己有可能要死在這里. 雖然和同行的團友一起, 可是死亡的恐懼如影隨行...

"I really wanted to shed my tears for a few times, but I kept telling myself not to do coz things would turn out fine. and the only thing I can do is to pray GOD."

"Well, there is a reason for everything, I believe such a thing happened just before my Birthday Eve, and I survive. Must be something."

"It was so warm when they saw my return. They hugged me tightly. it was so warm. and i saw the balloons, the gifts, the clean house... oh man..."

"well, sometimes you have to undergo bad things in order to know the good. "


那種死過返生的感覺. 明白. 只能說, "it is ok, the best thing is that you are still alive."
活著多好!!


在異國渡過了如此一個生日,  is really of something.

總是要在死亡前, 才想到有很多的事沒有完成, 很多的遺憾...
然後才驚覺,活著多好....

------
她說, 在宿舍, 有一個本地學生在一天之內給人打劫了兩次.
第一次是在早上六點, 在學校附近的oxxo給人拿刀搶了荷包.
而晚上3點, 在clubbing後, 走在回宿舍的路上,給一個蒙面人用槍打劫, 可他只剩下20peso了, 怕得要命, 但還好平安回來了.

在墨國, 真的, 平安是福.